A quarter of the way through!

I’m still at my friend’s house until tomorrow, but I told her I wanted to at least hit 25K by the end of the weekend so she’s been letting me write while she goes on the internet. (And yesterday when I didn’t want to do anything she gave me ice cream, which was a wonderful incentive that led to me writing 2K when I would probably have written nothing otherwise.)

I woke up this morning (well, afternoon) rather sick and didn’t want to do much writing. I realize this isn’t really in the spirit of JulNo, but I was feeling awful just looking at lights so computer screens didn’t really seem up my alley. I did eventually get up, though, and felt much better. I didn’t start writing until around 9 though because I am terrible and also was hanging out with people. (And I bought a book called Unnatural Creatures, which is a book of stories about monsters as collected by Neil Gaiman! I think reading that shall be my reward for when I hit 50K.) 

I was really worried to actually start writing because this is my least-planned part of the novel; I decided on a character archetype for the main character and nothing else. I didn’t even decide on anyone else’s names, which led to “Which actress do I like? Natalie Portman! Natalie is now her name” (this despite the fact that I don’t actually like Natalie Portman much at all; ah, well). 

But. I thought about it and decided on the main conflict of the next 10K or so (namely, is capital punishment cruel or necessary?) and now I am rocking it. If my wrists weren’t protesting so much, I’d love to write 5K more tonight.

I hit 25K though, and I’m really pleased. I’m overall rather pleased with my output this month, actually. I have written more in less time in previous NaNos, but I wasn’t as happy content-wise as I am with this. 

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On Holidays.

A quick note: apparently this blog is now three years old. Aw.

So today was the fourth of July (still is for about two more hours – and the guys shooting off fireworks down the street certainly aren’t letting us forget it. Hell yeah, America). Now, I’ve never in the past few years had problems with writing on holidays – even Thanksgiving, I can find time to squeeze in a few thousand words (and, to be honest, I’ve never not hit 50K by Thanksgiving). The fourth of July isn’t a big deal in my family. We do small things, have maybe one family member over. I think this is in part due to the fact that my dad died around this time of year? I mean, not entirely, it’s been five years, but I think the chill fourth events started because of that.

Anyway. I woke up this morning expecting to be able to write a thousand or so but my mom called me – we went shooting (archery) for a few hours. That’s okay, I told myself, I’ll write when we get back. But of course when we got back there was cleaning to be done, and then a guest over (and I’m not rude enough to leave the room/hide in my own when we have company) and, all things told, it’s 10:12 pm and I’ve written a hundred words. Granted, this is better than nothing, and I have thought a lot about what I’m going to write. It’s weird, though.

Holidays have never, ever affected my NaNoing (noveling, I suppose). I can always beg off, or hide in my room, or something. This time, though, the events just took over the day. I’m not complaining, though – I got a good workout and got to have a lot of great conversations with my family that I wouldn’t have had if I’d spent the whole time writing.

All things told, it’s 10:15 and I’m going to try to write a thousand or two before bed (by 12, I think, because I am absolutely exhausted). I’m sitting at 17K at the moment. My ultimate goal is 20,000 words, but I don’t know. If I can’t reach that, I won’t be upset at myself.

This JulNo is so chill. I’m enjoying myself, something that I don’t really get to do during most NaNo months – I spend the whole time not being happy with my output, or wanting to constantly write more. It’s a great experience, honestly! I like being proud of myself. I like enjoying what I write. I like writing 1K in 15 minutes and being proud rather than saying “there was a time I could write 1500 words in that time”. Yes, that’s true, but those words would also have been mostly crap while these are… not good but salvageable.

Essentially (or, as the internet kids say, tl;dr): I get, now, why people dread Thanksgiving so much during NaNo. I get it, you guys. (But I also really had a great day. So. Today was a success, if not so much for my writing.)

Circuit, take three.

I haven’t updated this in… what, two years? Oh, well. Life got in the way, I got another blog, I gave up on that as well. Perhaps this will be updated more often now; we’ll see. I’m not going to make promises because those never seem to work. Hopeful thoughts, more like.

Anyhow. I’ve been doing JulNoWriMo this month. It’s day three and I’m at roughly 11,000 words. This is my third time writing this novel – I’ve reworked the plot so much that it’s only recognizable as the same novel by the barest plot (war over water leads a group of survivors to flee to a new planet). I’ve been jokingly calling it a “feminist manifesto disguised as a sci-fi political thriller” because the entire idea of this draft stemmed from the line you could be the king but watch the queen conquer, from Nicki Minaj’s verse of Monster. Essentially, all of the people in power are women.

It’s interesting writing this because I’m trying very hard to put women in important roles, and men in the lesser roles. Not so much that it comes off as forced, hopefully. For example – I had a scene at a doctor’s office, and one of the characters was a receptionist. My go-to thought was a woman because that’s usually the gender you see as the “receptionist” or “secretary” in fiction nowadays but in making it a man it made the scene feel different to me.

Anyway. Perhaps that didn’t make sense. Essentially: in a surprise to no one, I’m thinking a lot about gender while writing the novel that will never be done (as I’ve been affectionately calling it).

I’m going really slowly writing this one. Well, slowly for me. I could do 10K a day if I wanted to, have another draft banged out really quickly, but to be honest I’m sick of entire rewrites. I’m trying not to burn myself out on this, to think about character motivations and how to resolve scenes other than “this is easiest! do that!”. It’s a lot of fun for me but it’s also really difficult; I’m not used to writing in this way. (I did 50K weekend two years ago and while it was fun, most of the writing is not salvageable.) Instead of writing in bursts and then quitting for months, I want to get myself back on track writing every day, even if it’s only 500 words before I go to sleep.

I suppose this is enough procrastination. In the time of writing this I’ve watched four YouTube videos and written two words on the actual novel. There will probably be more posts over the month, most of which will be about this novel (or the other stories I’m working on in between). 🙂 

87,000 words and #50kweekend.

So I wrote 19K today. I’m pretty pleased.

That’s 36K total for the weekend, which leaves 14 for tomorrow, which is probably doable.

Andddd a total of 87000 for the month so far.

I’m pretty pleased with this. It’s 12:35, and I think I can stay up to write another thousand or two.

Hooray!

I’ve written 47000 words the past three days. as I’ve said before: holy shit. holy shit. i need to stop being so competitive with myself.

50K has been hit.

So I sort of stopped writing for 15 days. Completely. I was at 40K, so I was still ahead on the 23rd when I decided to get back into the game, but still. That sucks.

I’ve hit 50K, which is fantastic. 🙂 Still never lost a WriMo, despite a bunch of after-school activities that decided to show up during November, of all months.

My goal for the weekend is to get to between 100 and 125K. If I can do that, I’ll be really pleased. If not… I don’t know.

I think I can, I think I can.

So long as my wrists shut up.

Intelligence?

The other day, I was talking to my family about college (because apparently that’s a thing I have to worry about now. Cue the panic) and my stepdad said something along the lines of “You got a great ACT score, your GPA is pretty good. You can go where you want.”

To this, I said “But I’m not smart enough for some schools.”

Both of them sort of blew up at me (understandably), saying that of course you’re smart enough and it’s not that you’re not intelligent, it’s that you didn’t have the proper training.

Perhaps this is true. Perhaps if I’d gone to a better school when I was younger, I’d be able to get into the schools that aren’t possibilities now. But, at the same time, you always have the kids that do have the opportunities, that do have the so-called ability, and can’t do it. They pay attention and they study like mad and still, they can’t pass that class, or test, or even finish the homework assignment.

I’ve always been a fairly intelligent person, but only in things like English. I understand that. I don’t understand math, other than Statistics. It doesn’t make sense to me. Does this mean I wasn’t given the proper tools when I was younger, even though clearly my English skills were set? Or do I have a block of some sort that keeps me from understanding “simple” math concepts?

I’m wondering about the nature of intelligence, here, and whether you’re born with the ability to understand subjects/ideas, or if they’re taught to you at a young age so that you get them when you’re older. I think it’s the former. You can always get better at things, but it’s like the left-brain/right-brain debate; you’re naturally better at some things than others.

I could probably make it as something in the English business, somehow. I have at least a bit of understanding of the language, and what it does. I couldn’t make it as anything related to math, because no matter how hard I try, I don’t understand it. If I don’t understand the concept/reasoning, I can’t do it, I suppose.

It’s not necessarily a bad thing. Perhaps I said it wrong before – it’s not that I’m not smart enough for a degree in math, it’s that I don’t understand it enough to do it competently.